According to the Cambridge Dictionary, being offended is the condition of having your feelings hurt especially because someone was rude or shows lack of respect.
Britannica Dictionary states that offense is something that causes a person to be hurt, angry or upset.
You wake up daily and just by going out, strolling to get a bottle of drink, even right there on your bed offenses come without you asking for it or someone asking “Can I offend you small?”, they just do… lol.
People do, and say things that hurt your feelings, some on purpose (very funny set of people) and some did it in ignorance (they really didn’t know and didn’t mean to) and the funny thing is that just one offense can spoil your day, your mood can go from 100 to zero in a second if your feelings get hurt. So I believe this is a very important topic to talk about because I will want to understand and be able to deal with something that can turn me into Pepe Madrigal (Go read about or watch Encanto if you don’t gerrit) in just a split second.
Offenses affects your heart, your mood, and it can dampen your spirit if you allow it.
On my own personal experience being offended, I was so hurt I could barely pray, or study; I just wanted to be on my bed, be cranky and annoyed. There was no drive to do any other things, my heart would beat so fast and I couldn’t even bear seeing the person. All of this and I you still want to keep allowing yourself get offended? Amazing!
I mentioned earlier that whether you sleep on your bed or you go out, the offense will come so I don’t think it is something you can really stop but I have found out that what you can do is to allow yourself not to be hurt by what was said or done, to control how it makes you feel, to move on from it and to allow yourself live.
Really, holding an offense to heart is like been the offender’s prisoner, its not worth it one bit. Sucha painful experience.
Oh, were you hurt? Yes.
Do you have the right to be angry? Double yes!
Is it worth staying on? My dear, it’s a big NO and you also know it!
Proverbs 12:16
“The arrogant fool’s anger is quickly known because he lacks self-control and common sense but a prudent man IGNORES an insult.”
One of the things our fleshy ego cannot do is to ignore! There are times we must deal with issues 1, set boundaries and of course move on from the situation but there are times you must totally ignore like nothing happened. You can’t deal with all issues with “talking it out”, there are some you deal with by “ignoring” 2 them but your flesh wants to prove a point and you drag yourself into drama and unnecessary emotional turmoil. By ignoring I mean moving on and forgiving the person totally. (Like gbe oju e, remove your eyes)
Then there are times you (by the wisdom of the Holy Spirit) call the person and talk it through.
“I do not like to be spoken to this way…”
“Can we do it this way…”
Oh you hurt me by what you said…”
But I tell you, it’s not everyone you can have this kind of conversation with, some people will even get “offended” and turn on you for even approaching them because they don’t believe they are wrong with what they said or did, I tell you. You can have this kind of conversations with those close to you (I don’t expect anyone close to you to be this toxic, if they are, go and pray!!!)
Leviticus 19:18
“You shall not take revenge nor bear any grudge against the sons of your people, but you shall love your neighbor (acquaintance, associate, and companion) as yourself…”
The devil understand what offenses can do to your heart and to unity among people so he introduces offenses every chance he gets.
If you are not careful, just an offense can cause discord, disunity, anger, unforgiveness, spiritual decadence, and more. This is why the Lord lays emphasis on you guarding your heart with everything and anything. One of the things that guards your heart is love! True Agape love; love for God, yourself and for others.
In his book “Following God’s purpose for your life”, Papa Kenneth E. Hagin mentioned that he tried as much as possible and did all he could to ensure his heart was right because whenever he fell sick it was because his heart was probably not right as he does not fall sick since been healed from a deformed heart and blood disease as a teen; he ensured that he walked in love with everyone. He gave a scenario of an evangelist who did him wrong when he invited him to minister in his church, he stated that normally they took offerings for anyone who came to minister in their church Tuesday, Friday and Sunday; the devil said to his mind “If I were you I wouldn’t take an offering for him for what he did”
He said because of that he took an offering for the evangelist everyday.
”He told the devil, “If you have anyother thing to say about him I will take two offerings in a day for him”
You see Papa Hagin did all he could to ensure he walked in love, he didn’t accept the suggestion of the devil which will only sow a seed of discord in his heart towards the evangelist.
Romans 13:8 says that “Owe no man anything but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.”
Loving God makes you adore your relationship with him that you do not allow your prayer life to be affected due to an offense, loving yourself will not allow you cause harm to your health due to offenses.
You can’t always control what people do to you, but you can definitely control how they make you feel and the condition your heart is by what they did.
If you have been offended by anyone and you really can’t get it out of your mind, can you pray for the Holy spirit to help your heart even as you choose to let go and forgive.
I trust the Lord to grant us more understanding in Jesus Name even as we grow in the knowledge of Him. Amen!
From Abba To Me 